Fashion trends that just won't die

Every year I catch wind of "hot new spring fashions" from magazines and TV. But every year, it seems to merely be a recycling of last year's horrendous fashions.

Now, I'm unhip and unfashionable, I'll admit. I hate most women's clothes with a passion.....but a few in particular just need to move on into the graveyard of bad fashion ideas.

1. One-strap tank tops

These have to be the stupidest article of clothing to ever hit the market. It just looks like someone hacked off a part of your shirt. Ooooohhh, you're so sexy with your one bare shoulder. Ooooooh.

2. Capri pants

Capri pants make every girl look fat. And the length is just long enough to hide too much leg and too short enough to be taken seriously. If you want shorter pants, wear crops, shorts or a skirt....not some lame compromise.

3. White pants/jeans/shorts

This tells me that you must spend your daytimes sitting on a window seat as your butler brings you tapioca. Because any woman that actually has things to do cannot wear white bottoms and not ruin them within hours. One night at work would ruin white pants for me.

4. Straw cowboy hats

Believe it or not, girls, "country" people don't wear cowboy hats. Trust me, I know. Only city poser girly girls and Nascar fans wear cowboy hats. It doesn't make you "earthy" to wear a cowboy hat. It makes you a big hick. (Unless you're from Texas, where this behavior is apparently acceptable)


I'll post more as I see them. I live in a constant state of outrage.